Coffee Check-In: Courage

Throughout my husband's time working on his master's degree in athletic coaching, we've often chatted with my folks about what comes after graduation. I'm so grateful for Chris's relationship with my parents; relationships with in-laws aren't always the easiest journey, but my folks and Chris have done an amazing job building, fostering, and maintaining a healthy relationship since we began dating. And when we talk about Chris' post-grad goals, I'm reminded how appreciative I am for my amazing family.

So recently, my folks were catching up with me on all our life things (cause as much as I share with y'all here, it's really only like a tenth of what we've got going on, and despite living about a mile from my folks, we see them MAYBE a few times a month), and with Chris working on the final portion of his master's program, the capstone, and me being laid off, they've been even more supportive of our paths and work. Over the last year, Chris has applied to quite a few jobs as an assistant swim coach at different universities, as that is his ultimate dream and one I am 100% behind. We hoped and honestly thought he'd have had a bit more luck than he has at this point, and my parents have been incredibly encouraging and reassuring, sharing their experiences and their belief in him.

My dad's constant reminder to not get discouraged and to keep learning from every situation has been awesome. It can be so easy to look at someone and what they're doing and say, 'Oh yeah. They'll have no problem getting a job," but the reality of the different industry's nuances is immense. On the flip side, there have been plenty of people who've heard about Chris' reason for pursuing his master's and his goal and are skeptical because of the non-traditional route he's taking and the intricacies and nuances it can take to get any job, let alone a rather niche one like collegiate swim coach.

I'm fortunate that my parents followed their dreams to pursue the work they wanted. While those careers may not be high-profile or compensated as appropriately in our society and state as in other cultures and places, they've made a difference in the lives of their students, workplaces, and fields of work. I was fortunate to grow up seeing this playout every day - the good, the bad, and the ugly. I know the hard work and sacrifices that achieving our goals means, and having the encouragement, understanding, and reassurance of those that have experienced that firsthand and continue to stand behind us, knowing how hard it can be, is beyond words, honestly.

That encouragement inspires our courage to continue down the roads that many question and give up.

Recently I was reminded of the interconnectedness of sadness and suffering. The journey Chris and I have been on since we first met has been hard, riddled with grief, frustration, and sacrifice. There has been so much sadness in many regards (for example, in our first year married, between the two of us, from the latter half of 2017 through the next 12 months, we lost and said goodbye to almost a dozen close family members and friends due to cancer, suicide, and other health reasons). We've been so tired for so long, but while there have been bouts where we certainly felt like we were suffering, we've done a pretty good job of enjoying the journey as much as possible through it all. After being married for six years and together for over seven, and despite my layoff and the hard work we have in front of us, the courage we have to keep going comes from the ability not to suffer more than we need (I always remind myself and Chris, it's important to feel the feels!) and from the encouragement of those who mean so much to us.

So a little philosophical question for you this morning - how are you going beyond compassion and sympathy? Because those feelings are just positive aspects of pity and concern. How are you encouraging, supporting, and working to understand and help others? Because that is not only empathy but courage to not necessarily take the easy route.

I'm not only getting back to earlier morning wake-up times (I love being a morning person!) but actually feeling awake at these times 😅 So I'm back to a nice Decaf Fortado with only two scoops of Think Creamer from Four Sigmatic. I'm putting in a lot of time working on my site and establishing my LLC this week, but I've been and will continue to enjoy the Tour De France in the background. If I listen to anything while working, it's a playlist curated by a composer with ADHD on Calm (search Sensory Alignment under the music section of the Calm app). It's hard not to get excited about this sport when you're married to a cyclist, and I've learned a lot in the last few years - it's an intense sport!!

Happy Wednesday, friends, and I hope everyone enjoyed the weekend holidays!