Coffee Check-In: Recovery

I've had difficulty deciding today's check-in topic, as several themes are intertwined, so I'll just lay 'em out!

Recovery.

Healing.

Energy.

Yesterday, my husband and I had a couple of great impromptu conversations that I continued to ruminate over during my morning walk and coffee. While I was organizing my freelance work and setting up my plan for the week, he stopped in the middle of the living room and just smiled at me. I grinned at him and asked what was up. We chatted for nearly an hour about our time together over the last seven years, personally and professionally, and how we've grown as individuals and as a team. This has been a recurring conversation over the last several months, especially thanks to being laid off. Still, because of the timing of the layoff and where we are at in our individual and combined personal and professional journeys, we've been able to see, recognize, verbalize, and appreciate with each other the growth that has taken place - that is taking place for us.

After our day of working, hubs mentioned how exhausted he was but also that he was kind of frustrated because he didn't feel as organized as he'd hoped by the end of the day. He told me how proud he was of me and all I'd done during the day, but he just didn't feel that accomplished and felt he shouldn't be as tired as he was. I let him talk through it and told him, "Don't take this the wrong way, but you're wrong." 😅 When Chris was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression in February, he was already dealing with a lot personally and professionally. Time has been flying by, and he's been dodging punches as much as possible and still taking punches with very little time to recover. However, he's always kept moving forward, working on growing and understanding what all these things mean for him. In just about a month, Chris was making realizations and progress with his ADHD, that took me years to realize and fully understand.

He was healing without real recovery time, and sometimes the overwhelm was so debilitating he would be exhausted by lunchtime and take a several-hour restless nap to have enough mental, physical, and emotional energy to keep working on his projects. We broke down simple assignments question by question and reading and modules section by section to help show him that he was accomplishing what he needed even though he didn't always feel productive. He's pretty goal-oriented, so this helped a lot.

Yesterday he got through the start of organizing his last grad course AND doing several different house chores while, of course, managing his Type 1 Diabetes (those with T1D can make up to 180 extra decisions a day, by the way - which, oh yeah, can be life and death), and navigating the storms so we could make sure Mando got enough outside time (Mando has terrible storm anxiety). Oh yeah, on top of still processing mentally and emotionally from our time out in Oregon. I reminded him of where he was just a few months ago and what he accomplished yesterday. Oh yeah, on top of still processing mentally and emotionally from our time out in Oregon.

How we address recovery impacts our healing and ultimately our energy. And these aren't quick fixes. Three days of bereavement leave does not even cover recovering from losing a loved one, let alone the healing it will take, and that can impact someones energy for weeks, months, even years. And recovery and healing isn't just meant for injuries and deaths; there are so many different aspects of life that can impact people differently based on a multitude of factors and reasons. Give yourself grace. Give each other grace ❤️️

Can we just recognize the beautiful yin and yang Chris created in my half-caff this morning?! It was definitely a great little surprise to start the day! Chris even forgot to make his own coffee as he was so excited about his creation 😜 I haven't been sleeping much the last few nights (excitement I think from the work and organization I'm doing), so I went with a bit more caffeine today! Ironically enough, Chris is napping after his early morning run - and probably from not getting his coffee, so details on his cup of joe will have to wait until tomorrow!